Shared Parenting - Mediation Can Serve As A Reality Check For Your Parenting Plan

Are you sharing nicely when it comes to the children?

Every parent has told their children many times that they have to be nice and share. To sweeten the job of sharing, parents may get each child involved, so that, for example, one child divides the pile of candy and the other child chooses first.

When parents are sharing children, it's just as important that the same niceties are observed, and that each parent is involved in creating a balanced parenting schedule. If the schedule favors one parent with significantly more time than the other, that second parent is much less likely to comply with the plan.

Mediation serves as a reality check for parents when they are working out the details of a parenting plan and parenting schedule. For example, from an objective perspective, a mediator may ask one parent if s/he would be willing to accept the schedule if the roles were reversed. If the answer is a resounding NO, the mediator can lead the parents into a discussion of how the schedule could be more balanced in the quantity and quality of the parenting time for both parents.

Shared balance in a parenting schedule does not necessarily mean equal time for each parent; it DOES mean adopting a schedule that allows the children to have the best of both parents. For example, if one parent is available while the other parent is working, an optimal shared schedule would place the children with that parent instead of in daycare.

Each parenting schedule can be as unique as the people using it, and the best ones are balanced, thoughtful and creative. The beauty of the mediation process is that it helps parents explore new possibilities and create a schedule that really works for the whole family.

© 2008, Mary Wollard, Family Solutions Center, LLC

Mary A. Wollard, JD, is an attorney, mediator, and arbitrator with over 20 years experience in solving the legal issues of divorce, parenting (custody), marital property and support. Visit http://www.cofamilysolutions.com/downloads.htm for free downloadable worksheets you can use to organize your family's transition.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mary_Wollard

California Divorce and Child Custody: What is the Purpose of Child Custody Mediation?

Mediation in California is a form of alternative dispute resolution, or ADR, facilitated by a mediator, which allows parents of a child custody and visitation dispute an opportunity to resolve their disagreements without a litigated hearing. As pointed out in Family Code 3170, mediation is a mandatory process in California that must take place before a contested issue regarding custody and visitation is heard in a litigated hearing. Mediation has a specific purpose and mediators should adhere to certain guidelines and standards when conducting mediation.

Mediation Standards

There are certain standards that apply to mediation services. The rules for mediation are set forth in the California Rules of Court 5.210. Rule 5.210 applies to court-connected child custody mediation and addresses the authority of mediation, purpose of mediation, mediation definitions, Responsibility for mediation services, mediation process, training, continuing education, and experience requirements for mediator, mediation supervisor, and family court services director, education and training providers, and ethics as it relates to California mediators and California mediation.

Mediation Purpose

The purpose of mediation is to help the parents of a child custody dispute resolve their disagreements and build a parenting plan together in mediation that reflects the overall best interest of the children. The purpose of mediation is outlined in Family Code 3161.

Mediation Limitations

Mediation may not be able to help all parents work out their disputes. Some cases are too complex or far too acrimonious. In some cases, a parent will change his/her mind after signing an agreement in mediation. If you sign an agreement in mediation and later change your mind, you may be able to cancel your agreement by submitting your cancellation request to mediation services in writing. However, you will want to consult an attorney to learn how to properly cancel your agreement and the timeline upon which you can do it.

If you are involved in mediation you will want to consult an attorney in your area to help you learn about the mediation process, standards, purpose, your rights, and what mediators can and cannot do in mediation.

© 2007 Child Custody Coach

Child Custody Coach supplies information, online materials, and coaching services to parents in the field of child custody, namely, divorce, child custody and visitation, child custody evaluations, 730 evaluations, parenting, and all issues related to child custody and divorce. "How to Win Child Custody - Proven Strategies that can Win You Custody and Save You Thousands in Attorney Cost!" is a unique child custody strategy guide written by The Custody Coach and made available by Child Custody Coach in an easy to read, understand, and apply E-Book format. Custody Match is an online consumer and family law attorney matching service to help you in your search for the right attorney for your divorce or child custody case. Custody Match can help you find the right family law attorney, divorce lawyer, or child custody attorney in your area.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Steven_Carlson