Monday, April 21, 2008

Teens Learn Communication Skills From Summer Camp

At Quantum Learning Network we use some powerful tools for achieving clear, constructive communication and teach these tools in all our academic summer camps, SuperCamp and Quantum U, and our many school programs. Communication is the key to positive, meaningful relationships in all areas of our lives—home, school, college, and career. Wherever we are in life, the ability to relate to others and communicate clearly gives us an added advantage.

One of our most useful communication tools is called Open the Front Door, or OTFD, which stands for Observation, Thought, Feeling, and Desire. This positive approach to communicating in uneasy situations opens a path for discussing disagreements, clearing up miscommunication, and creating solutions.

It's hard to communicate negative feelings without slipping into negative patterns such as laying blame, attacking, accusing, or insulting. But these approaches never accomplish anything positive. The only power they have is to damage, confuse, wound feelings, and inspire the other person to respond in a similar tone. But if we use a positive approach, even in a tense atmosphere, we have a chance to forge a bond of communication.

OTFD: Open the Front Door

OTFD is particularly good for communicating negative feelings, but it can be used in almost any situation, with almost anyone. This method communicates four vital pieces of information: Observation, Thought, Feeling, and Desire.

O - Observation is simply stating the facts of the situation, something you observed that anyone else could observe.

Example: I noticed that everyone left the meeting without helping to clean up and put the furniture back. (Not, I noticed you were inconsiderate.)

T - Thought is an opinion or thought about what you observed.

Example: I think that people are assuming I am responsible for cleaning up because I am the instructor.

F - Feeling is how you felt about what you observed.

Example: I feel frustrated because I have work to get back to just like everyone else.

D - Desire is what you want for the future.

Example: I would like us to take turns setting up and breaking down for the meetings.

Following these four steps tells the other person precisely what they need to know in order to understand the situation you're speaking about. Often, you’ll find when you finish communicating this way, the person you’re talking to will agree: “Yes, I see why you feel this way.” Compare this to what happens when you try to express an upset through blame, shame, judgment, or ridicule, and you’ll see the power in this tool.

SuperCamp summer programs fill up fast. Parents, go to http://www.SuperCamp.com now to learn about enrolling your son or daughter while space remains. Age-specific programs are available for students in grades 4-12 and incoming college freshmen. At the website, you also can get a free eBook that gives you an inside look at what works with teens from a world leader in youth achievement, SuperCamp co-founder Bobbi DePorter.

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